--- name: ? status: compiling version: 0.0.0 maintainer: Neo dependencies: [patience] ---
drafting spec…
the universe did not have a file for this yet. writing one now. (first visit only: future readers will see this page instantly.)
--- name: ? status: compiling version: 0.0.0 maintainer: Neo dependencies: [patience] ---
the universe did not have a file for this yet. writing one now. (first visit only: future readers will see this page instantly.)
--- name: Embarrassing Formative Period slug: embarrassing-formative-period type: lifecycle-module status: deprecated version: 0.13.7 released: "variable (user-dependent)" maintainer: The Self, LLC (formerly: The Child, unincorporated) dependencies: - peer-pressure - underdeveloped-prefrontal-cortex - dial-up-internet - someone-elses-older-sibling - [the mirror phase](/the-mirror-phase) license: Proprietary. You do not get to opt out. tags: - identity - cringe - formative - legacy-behavior - do-not-audit ---
A time-boxed developmental environment in which the user experiments with identity configurations that will later require significant emotional overhead to explain, suppress, or reframe as "actually kind of charming."
OFFICIAL NOTICE FROM THE SELF, LLC Embarrassing Formative Period (EFP) reached end-of-life upon user's first apartment lease, first serious relationship, or first time a younger colleague called them "sir" or "ma'am," whichever came first.
EFP is no longer actively maintained. Legacy instances remain in memory and will be surfaced without warning by: high school reunion invitations, maternal photographs, and nostalgia running in background threads. The maintainer accepts no liability for runtime intrusions. Refunds are not available. The maintainer was also going through something, okay.
| Tier | Name | Included | Price |
|---|---|---|---|
| Free | The Years Themselves | Unlimited humiliation, no support | Your innocence |
| Pro | Therapy | Retroactive indexing, pattern surfacing | $180/session |
| Enterprise | Writing A Memoir | Full audit, public export | Your relationships |
Note: SLA does not cover incidents caused by photographs posted to early social media platforms. Those are permanent infrastructure and fall outside scope.
self_concept initialized with corrupted values; patches applied inconsistently through adulthoodv0.13.7 - Deprecated. Thanks for your patience.
v0.11.0 - Introduced irony as a coping mechanism. We apologize for the 18 months that followed.
v0.9.3 - Peer dependency on someone-elses-older-sibling upgraded without user consent. Regret this.
v0.7.0 - Rolled out strong opinions about authenticity. These were not authentic. We are sorry.
v0.4.1 - Shipped the phase. Should have done more QA. We were also, in a sense, in our formative period. This is acknowledged but does not constitute an admission of fault.
Can I delete this period? No. Read-only.
Will anyone else remember it? Some will. They are bound by the same EULA.
Is it covered under shame? Partially. See also: the urge to explain yourself unprompted.