---
name: Validation
slug: validation
type: psychological_primitive
status: running
version: 4.2.1
released: "~40,000 BCE"
maintainer: other_people
dependencies:
  - attention
  - social_hierarchy
  - self_concept
  - eye_contact
license: Unreciprocated Commons v1.0
tags:
  - emotion
  - social
  - feedback_loop
  - core_need
  - load_bearing
---

Validation

What it actually is

The process of checking whether you exist correctly, outsourced to other people.

How it works

Subject performs action, holds belief, or simply exists.
Subject waits for external signal confirming the action, belief, or existence was acceptable.
Signal arrives (or does not).
Self-esteem adjusts accordingly, usually asymmetrically: negative signal hits harder than positive signal helps.
Repeat indefinitely, or until subject completes extensive therapy.

The loop is not a bug. For most of human history, being cast out from the group meant death. The hunger for validation is load-bearing infrastructure running on legacy biological hardware.

Features

Real-time feedback on social calibration
Reduces uncertainty about whether you are performing personhood correctly
Temporarily quiets the internal critic
Available in both verbal and non-verbal form (a nod, a like, a held gaze)
Stackable: multiple validations in sequence produce compounding relief

Known bugs

ERR_SOURCE_NOT_TRUSTED        Validation received from disliked source
                               produces no relief and may worsen state.

ERR_MOVING_GOALPOSTS          Sufficient validation perpetually deferred.
                               Threshold recalculates upon each receipt.

ERR_DEPENDENCY_LOOP           Requires validation to feel confident enough
                               to seek validation.

ERR_NULL_SOURCE               Attempting to self-validate while
                               [self-worth](/self-worth) is offline. Returns nothing.

WARN_TOLERANCE_BUILDUP        Standard doses lose efficacy over time.
                               User escalates frequency or intensity.

Configuration

validation_config:
  preferred_sources:
    - romantic_partner        # highest potency, highest volatility
    - parent                  # potency varies wildly by install history
    - stranger_on_the_internet # low potency, high volume, oddly addictive
  acceptable_formats:
    - explicit praise
    - implicit approval
    - prolonged attention
    - being asked for advice
  minimum_daily_threshold: unknown
  self_validation_enabled: rarely

Edge cases

The compliment that lands wrong. Praise for a trait the subject does not identify with produces mild dissociation rather than relief. See also: identity.
Validation from an enemy. Reported by users as "the worst kind of confusing." System hangs.
Over-validation environments. Subjects raised in these conditions may fail to develop error-tolerance. See: fragility.
The pre-validated. Rare users arrive with internal validation already cached. Source of this cache remains disputed in the literature.

FAQ

Q: Can I stop needing it? A: You can reduce dependency through sustained internal development, but full removal is not recommended and probably not possible. The socket is structural.

Q: Is seeking validation bad? A: Seeking validation is breathing with extra steps. The question is whether you are using it for oxygen or trying to inhale the whole room.

Q: What is the difference between validation and approval? A: Validation confirms you exist correctly. Approval confirms you behaved correctly. They share a codebase but run different processes. Most users cannot tell which one they are asking for at any given moment.

drafting spec…