--- name: ? status: compiling version: 0.0.0 maintainer: Neo dependencies: [patience] ---
drafting spec…
the universe did not have a file for this yet. writing one now. (first visit only: future readers will see this page instantly.)
--- name: ? status: compiling version: 0.0.0 maintainer: Neo dependencies: [patience] ---
the universe did not have a file for this yet. writing one now. (first visit only: future readers will see this page instantly.)
---
name: A Tuesday in March
slug: a-tuesday-in-march
type: temporal unit
status: deprecated
version: 3.21.2
released: "annually, against all better judgment"
maintainer: gregorian-calendar-consortium
dependencies:
- february (bloated, finally done)
- monday (precondition, usually botched)
- the-concept-of-continuation
- mild-disappointment
license: Public Domain (no one would claim this)
tags:
- time
- liminal
- mid-week
- not-quite-anything
- grey
---
# A Tuesday in March
## What it actually is
The calendar's shrug. Not winter, not spring. Not the start of the week, not the relief of its end. Just a slot that has to exist for the math to work.
## How it works
The system allocates 24 hours. They arrive. Nothing greets them. The light is slightly longer than yesterday but you will not notice this. You will notice only that it is neither morning nor not-morning for an unusually long time. [dread](/dread) queues in the background without logging an error. You go through the motions. The motions go through you.
> "I kept thinking something was supposed to happen."
> — every user, unprompted
## Features
- Technically functional
- Structurally identical to any other day, which is the problem
- Supports [coffee](/coffee) as primary interface
- Compatible with most productivity systems (none of which will be opened)
- Arrives reliably, regardless of whether this was requested
## Known Bugs
This is the main event. Sit down.
| Bug ID | Description | Status | Severity |
|--------|-------------|--------|----------|
| `TMM-001` | User wakes with faint sense that something important was supposed to happen this year by now | persistent | critical |
| `TMM-002` | [hope](/hope) allocated in January fully garbage-collected by now, no replacement scheduled | by design | critical |
| `TMM-003` | The to-do list from Monday still open. Still. | chronic | high |
| `TMM-004` | Ambient awareness that March is half over and nothing is different | cannot reproduce (can always reproduce) | high |
| `TMM-005` | User opens window expecting symbolic seasonal confirmation; receives grey sky, a plastic bag in a tree, mild wind | environmental | medium |
| `TMM-006` | [time](/time) continues to pass at normal rate despite the sensation that this particular day is made of wet cement | working as intended | high |
| `TMM-007` | Other people appear to be moving through the day with purpose. Source unknown. Possibly a bug in their rendering. | unverified | low |
Patches have been discussed at every planning meeting since the Gregorian overhaul. None shipped.
## Configuration
```yaml
# /etc/tuesday-in-march/config.yml
weather: ambiguous
temperature: "technically above freezing"
light_quality: "not enough to lift anything, too much to ignore"
email_load: medium-high, all of it unremarkable
existential_overhead: elevated
soundtrack: something you liked in your early twenties, now poignant for no reason
This unit is deprecated in the sense that it will be replaced by Wednesday and never once mourned. It joins a long list of deprecated Tuesdays stretching back to whenever time began making its slow, indifferent argument. No migration path. No sunset party. No one will write a post about it.
The spec will be updated next March. Nothing will change.